Fur, Rats, and Chocolate Ribbits
by claraowl
Summary: Crookshanks has his own views on the Romione relationship in third year. Told through journal entries, he watches and records the events that take place between his "mist" and the "Ron-boy". The first fic I ever wrote- please read and review!


Disclaimer: Oh, to own the world of HP! Or, at least, Crookshanks...

Fur, Rats, and Chocolate Ribbits

Call me Crookshanks. I am half cat, half kneazle. This makes me much smarter than regular cats, although I do look like one. This is my mist's (or owner, in human) third year at this, ah, 'school' ( which is the human word for learning center- humans have such odd terms for these things!), Hogwarts. It is, I must admit, a simply marvelous old castle. It has an almost infinite number of place to hide (and explore). There is a rather interesting old cat named Mrs. Norris. She is the er, "pet" (another odd human term) of a man named Mr. Filch. She shares his views on everything from aardvarks to zyzzyvas, and then some. They adore each other, and I am sure that if he was a cat, they would mate.

I apologize. I have gone off the topic I am meaning to write upon this parchment. You see, dear cat (or odd human, as the case may be), I am not writing for enjoyment, yours or mine, no indeed! I am writing to tell you what I am witnessing during this year at Hogwarts. So my entries begin…

**87 Purrent (cat) or 11 September (human)**

In case you do not know this, my mist goes by the name of Hermione Granger. In the cat translation, it means 'she who steps through the fog'. I think this is quite fitting, as my mist has the rare gift of conversing with animals. (The last human to have this was the great Dr. DoLittle himself!) She quite literally steps through the fog that is the language barrier between animals an humans. Back to my entry… My mist was upset earlier by one of her, ah, 'friends' (another odd human term), with whom she often quarrels. This time I do believe that it involved myself and his "rat". His rat is not a true rat, but a human in disguise. Because of this, I mistrust not only the "rat" but the boy. I still wish to eat the "rat", but I fear poisoning.

**17 Meowtoe or 31 October**

I have not written in quite some time. I apologize. There has been nothing to write about up till now… My mist was in the village all day, along with most of the 'students' (will I ever get used to these human terms?) from the 'school'. One of her two male 'friends' went with her and one stayed here. She went with the one with the "rat". I have learned from one of our frequent chats that the boy's name is Ron and the "rat's" name is Scabbers. Mist is in a good mood, now, after coming back. She is in a very good mood. I shall ask what happened.

**18 Meowtoe or 1 November**

I have spoken to my mist. She had a rather interesting time in the village yesterday, but refused to tell me about it. She has been turning red (or 'blushing', as the humans call it - such odd terms!) whenever I try to speak of it. I find this odd and am very worried, for she has also been acting strangely near the boy called Ron, 'blushing' when he is near. I must now do a most despicable act and read my mist's private writings, or 'diary', and copy it on this page.

_October 31__st__, 3__rd__ year_

_Dear Diary,_

_The most amazing thing happened today! Wait, I'd better start from the top so I will make sense. I went to Hogsmeade with Ron today. As I told you before, Harry didn't have permission and couldn't go. We were walking around, and a elderly woman stopped us. _

_She said, "I don't mean to intrude, dearies, but you two make a lovely couple." That shook us up a little, and we hastened to explain that we were just friends, and that our other friend couldn't come. She just smiled, replied, "You'll see, you'll feel, and you'll know… eventually…", and walked away. We were careful to keep a third of a meter between us after that…__until we were on the edge of the village, right near a forest. There was light shining between the trees, seeming to beckon us to come through the trees. _

_I voiced my confusion, saying, "Odd, that path- it's overgrown. I wonder what's back there." _

_This was met with the reply, "I thought you knew everything about Hogsmeade, Hermione." _

_To which I said, "Oh, shut up and come on, Ronald. I want to know what's back there." He grinned and darted ahead of me into the trees. I was quick to follow. Then we both came to a halt with a gasp in a clearing. It was beautiful! There was a grand old weeping willow hanging over a pond, and everything was so green! I rushed forward to touch the water(as I love to do,) and felt myself slip. The next thing I knew, Ron grabbed me by the waist and was trying to stop my fall. Suddenly his face was coming nearer, as he pulled me off the rock, stopping me from tumbling into the water, and then… I cannot write any more. I promised never to tell without agreement, as did he. Thus, I cannot write this in you, diary, lest you fall into another's hands. Let me just say that I'll never look at Halloween the same way ever again!_

_Love,_

_Hermione J. Granger _

_P.S. I did touch the water afterwards._

Curious. I shall write more later. I am worried, too worried to write.

**19 Meowtoe or 3 November**

I am very, very, very confused. Humans once more befuddle me. My mist quarrels with the boy called Ron, yet… I cannot tell why she is 'friends'(shall I ever get used to human terms? I doubt it.) with him, and they actually shares a 'secret' (odd, odd human terms)! And she scarcely ever quarrels with her other friend, the boy called Harry, but does not seem as attached to him as to the other. Humans befuddle me, I fear I shall never understand them, even if I am, as a half-cat, half-kneazle, smarter. From this point on I shall follow around my mist and the boy called Ron, either in turns or together, except in lessons, obviously. I shall from now on write only at night.

**22 Meowtoe or 5 November**

I am disgruntled. My mist and the Ron boy blush whenever their eyes meet. I haven't an idea what to do. I must confess that the situation is frightening, as I saw my mist, ah, 'kiss' a piece of paper when she had 'lip stick' on, then send it off by dove. My mist is stirring… more tomorrow night.

**23 Meowtoe or 6 November**

One thing I have forgotten to mention: I have met a dog-human. I have learned that these humans, animagi, I recall, have the ability to turn into certain animals. This explains the Ron boy's rat. At first, I didn't trust this 'Sirius', but he is a good dog, rather, a good human. He has informed me that the 'candies' my mist likes are called 'candy canes' and 'chocolate frogs' (humans have such odd terms). He says that I can help him, and he can help me, in human terms of 'love'.

**47 Meowtoe or 1 December**

How I am thankful for Sirius's help! However, I am not happy with what has been interpreted about my mist and the Ron boy. Apparently, the two of them are, or so Sirius says, 'at least attracted' or 'possibly in love'. He had to explain these terms to me, and I must say that I am very disgruntled. What am I to do about the Ron boy and the evil "rat-human"? Some good news, though: my mist and the Ron boy have been quarreling! But also bad news: these quarrels cause my mist to 'cry', and they also make up the next day. What's a half-kneazle to do? My mist doesn't believe me when I tell her about the Ron boy's rat. I need help…

**79 Sleeptail (human unknown)**

The events of today, or rather tonight, were amazing. The 'rat' was exposed. Sirius was almost free, and escaped on the back of the hippogriff Buckbeak. The Ron boy's leg broke. Unfortunately, this upset my mist. Oh, well, at least Sirius is free. However, the 'rat' escaped. I still wish to eat him, but I cannot. This is almost the end of my mist's third year at Hogwarts. And now… we shall go 'home' soon. I suppose I shall get used to the Ron boy… This is the last entry of this year, maybe I shall write more next year. I enjoy Hogwarts, and I shall miss it. I am wiser, but I still do not understand humans. However, I understand chocolate ribbits, and the fact that they are very tasty. Call me Crookshanks. Half-cat, half-kneazle. Farewell,

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**Crookshanks**

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